From the monthly archives:

May 2008

Clay Aiken in Spermalot!

by Chexy on May 30, 2008


The gummy American Idol sweetheart has gone and done it now! It was revealed yesterday by the august TMZ that Clay Aiken’s sperm (that phrase!) has been used to impregnate the producer Jaymes Foster — who is not a man, but is apparently Clay’s longtime hag who lives with him in Los Angeles. I say, Mazel Tov! That little vixen! (Clay.) The above unretouched photo shows how he prepared for his new role.

Darn. I was hoping that Clay would be the second pregnant man. Clay’s sexuality has long been the subject of speculation by those with no perception whatsoever.

God bless Clay and his pregnant pal, who prove that a real friend will bitch out her womb for you… or give you his best shot. Okay, I’m done.

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in american idol, babies, medicine, wonders

Harvey Korman Dies at 81

by Chexy on May 29, 2008

Hedy Lamarr.

Hedley Lamarr.

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in cinema, ends, last hurrahs, legends, memorials

Of Donuts and Terror

by Chexy on May 29, 2008


The EVOO Queen is EVIL! Squeaky dumbass Rachael Ray allowed herself to be costumed in a PLO-ish scarf for a Dunkin’ Donuts Iced Coffee commercial for TV. They pulled the ad today after complaints that it looked like she supported terrorism. Lord knows that the popularity of these scarves will help camouflage the REAL terrorists when they show up here on foot trying to blow up bakeries. Anyway, she does scare me! Always has!

But let’s talk about the terror of donuts for a moment. One Glazed Donut from Dunkin’ Donuts is 230 calories, with 90 from fat… plus 320mg of sodium! Add a glass of their Iced Coffee — averaging 240 calories — and you’ve got yourself a 470 calorie snack that’s loaded with fat and sodium! That’s the real terror… beside Rachael Ray’s annoyingly fizzy persona.

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in diet, fear, food, morons, terror, world affairs

Beam Me Up, Scotty, You Fucking Liar

by Chexy on May 29, 2008

Boo hoo, poor wittle Scotty McClellan had his arm twisted to perpetrate one of the biggest lies ever foisted on the American public — the phony “weapons of mass destruction” charge against Iraq to sell the war. Of course, neo-Nazi Condi Rice is still sticking with her story, because she knows that nothing sells like propaganda, bitches! The left was right all along — the war was and continues to be a big fat lie. (When will Condi just burst into flames?)


Watch for a slew of Machiavellian Team Bush bastards to now make their cynical last hurrahs in bookstores to wring every last dollar from their sickening twists of truth, even clutching their imaginary pearls while gasping, “What?! I had no idea they were lying!” These people are ruthlessly cynical — they actually believe what they say when they say it — which I suppose helps for telegenic believability.

As the long parade of hideous media monsters during our lengthy nightmare of Bush comes to a cataclysmic close, look for more fevered backstabbing and infighting from the macabre manipulators who duped average Americans into a disastrous six-hundred-billion-dollar war — which has done absolutely nothing but destroy lives and wreak untold havoc — and line the pockets of heartless fatcat bastard Republicans.

Get ready, because they’re again blaming the Democrats for the Bush failures and thievery.

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in bastards, chaos, crap, horror, last hurrahs, maniacs, money, morons, murder, politics, power, reality tv, whatever, world affairs

Phil Hartman Dead 10 Years

by Chexy on May 28, 2008

I had the great good fortune to see Phil Hartman in The Groundlings stage debut of The Pee-wee Herman Show back in the ’80s. He played the Popeye-ish Captain Carl, and was absolutely brilliant. His wife Brynn shot him three times in the head on May 28, 1998 while he slept in cartoon Dachsund boxer shorts in their Encino home, then she went and told a friend, then she shot herself in the head. It was later discovered that she was on Zoloft, coke and alcohol. Nuts.


My nephew Jake got me to start watching The Simpsons, and I can’t help but feel that twinge of sadness and delight each time Troy McClure appears — who is featured today on Wikipedia’s start page. Hartman’s Sinatra was just hilarious, it seems there was no bit that he couldn’t put over with his peerless comic timing and panache. He was even able to bring some humor to the tiresome NewsRadio show. His voice had the booming timbre of pure comedy.

His two children were raised by Brynn’s family.

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in drugs, mayhem, murder, remembering

Holocaust Memorial for Gays

by Chexy on May 27, 2008


Germany dedicated a monument on Tuesday to the estimated 15,000 (some say as many as 600,000) gay men sent to concentration camps in the Nazi era. Few survived. I recommend Gad Beck’s book, An Underground Life: Memoirs of a Gay Jew in Nazi Berlin.


The holocaust memorial is a single concrete slab, mirroring the Tiergarten Park memorial to the Jewish victims — but the concrete slab has a small window that shows a film of two men kissing, Berlin’s first memorial to the Nazis’ gay victims.


(blogger’s conception)

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in 1930, gays, haters, horror, memorials, politics, torture

Sharon Throws Stone at China

by Chexy on May 27, 2008

Wackadoodle philanthropist Sharon Stone blabbed in Cannes that the devastating earthquake in China was because of their treatment of Tibet and the Dalai Lama, saying, “…this earthquake and stuff happened and I thought, ‘Is that karma, when you’re not nice and the bad things happen to you?’”


Stone stopped short, however, of blaming her own karma for the $5,971, 336 domestic gross of “Basic Instinct 2.”

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in morons, whatever, world affairs, wrecks

Time to Go

by Chexy on May 24, 2008

Hillary Clinton slipped her fat ass over the edge yesterday with her campaign death knell remark about hanging in the race in case there’s an assassination, chirpily reminding that RFK took a bullet in ’68.


There’s what’s happened to the Clinton idealism; if you can’t win, hope for a maniac to shoot. It’s not only embarrassingly pathetic, it’s tragic that such a competent political operator like Hillary would stoop that low — and it wasn’t unintentional. You know that remarks on the campaign trail are as scripted as a Wheaties commercial… you can be sure that little nugget went through iterations — if not with advisers, then at least in her blonded head.

If the public hasn’t been thoroughly repulsed by her reluctance to hang it up, this act of desperation should convince them. Is it any wonder that the Secret Service hates her? Now she’s intent on making everyone else hate her too. And it’s working.


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in clintons, horror, kennedys, maniacs, politics

If You’re Traveling This Weekend…

by Chexy on May 23, 2008

…have a nice trip!


Cool, huh? Look away and it starts moving again. This sure beats looking at the photo in the next story, doesn’t it?

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in oddities, whatever

UK Says Okay to Gay Iranian

by Chexy on May 22, 2008

Finally, Britain has granted asylum to a 19-year-old gay Iranian who feared that he would be executed if returned to his homeland — where those insane sonsabitches had already hanged his lover.


Asylum for Mehdi Kazemi had originally been rejected by London lawmakers, causing an international furor among civilized societies.

In a response from across the pond, New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg welcomed the nation’s sailors for Fleet Week.

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in fear, haters, horror, maniacs, religion, sex, world affairs