Uncompromising doofus Ashton Kutcher as he appeared in brownface in a now pulled PopChips ad, and the New Jersey tan mom, arrested for allegedly putting her 5-year-old daughter in a tanning bed.

One pales in comparison.

This 3.75″ Royal Doulton turban boy figurine, from the artist Leslie Harradine, was produced from 1922-36.

It is valued at $2,000.

Warsaw’s own Lyda Roberti was one of the brightest vamps on the Paramount lot in the early 1930s, and she’s today’s Friday Face.

Her father and grandfather were famous clowns, and she was literally born in the circus. Her dad, “Roberti,” traveled the world as a performing clown. Lyda inherited his comic timing.

Comedian Lou Holz discovered Lyda in Vaudeville and took her to Broadway, where she became a hit in “You Said It.” Paramount signed her in 1932.

When Thelma Todd woke up dead in a garage in Malibu, Lyda replaced her in several films, teamed with Todd’s comic partner, Patsy Kelly.

She married aviator and radio announcer Bud Ernst, and he nearly crashed their plane on the way back from a quickie marriage in Yuma, Arizona. (They met in a hospital where she was recovering from an appendectomy and heart problems, and he from a car accident.)

According to Patsy Kelly, on Sunday, March 13, 1938, Roberti bent over to tie her shoes and died of a heart attack. She was only 31.

A thousand gardenias graced her coffin.

Lyda Roberti, Polish clown and fleeting superstar, is today’s Friday Face.

Here’s Lyda in 1934′s “College Rhythm.” (Watch for previous Friday Face Franklin Pangborn.)

Fun Fact: Bud Ernst went on to marry Mary Pickford’s niece, then TV spokeswoman Betty Furness, twice. On April 11, 1950, he shot himself to death in a New York hotel room at age 39.

Here’s Lyda with another hot song. Nice blouse.

Okay, Valentines… let’s do it. Ella swings it.

La vie en rose. Marlene Dietrich at 71 in ’72.

Dino croons it. So groovy.

Stevie, 1974.

God bless Rosa Parks, born on this day in 1913. One person can change the world.

For the Sephardim.

Miller and Lyles.

Billie at Carnegie Hall…

The Hand-Sculpted iRetrofone Base from artist Scott Freeland, for when you’re expecting Rosalind Russell to call.

This is a fully-functional, stationary iPhone dock with working handset and complete compatibility with USB cable.

What a wonderful world.

Retails for $195.

What a Wonderful World Louis Armstrong from noktasat on Vimeo.

Elton John being interviewed while in a queen costume for his Super Bowl ad for Pepsi, and Mickey Mouse in “Brave Little Tailor” as he addresses the king.

Nice floor on the left.

ty Steve H.

Bring on the tap dancing kids.

Refaced Scientologist Greta Van Susterin interviews molten hot First Lady wannabe Callista Gingrich. Keep an eye on her hair.

Rockin’ it old school… Linda Hopkins.

From 1934′s “Down to Their Last Yacht,” the strangest big musical number of the era. It just keeps getting better, and by better, I mean I can’t believe it. Wait for the ship scene.

Joel Grey, 79, and Liza Minnelli, 65, as seen in 1972′s “Cabaret,” and below, forty years later, at last night’s performance of Cole Porter’s “Anything Goes,” in which Grey has extended his run as Moonface Martin through April.

Child star Miley Cyrus as she appeared this weekend, and child star Shirley Temple in the 1930s.

One claims it was salvia.