News, Politics, Religion, Entertainment, Gossip and Opinion for Thinking Folks
From the category archives:
Bring on the tap dancing kids.
Refaced Scientologist Greta Van Susterin interviews molten hot First Lady wannabe Callista Gingrich. Keep an eye on her hair.
Rockin’ it old school… Linda Hopkins.
From 1934′s “Down to Their Last Yacht,” the strangest big musical number of the era. It just keeps getting better, and by better, I mean I can’t believe it. Wait for the ship scene.
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in 1930, animals, animation, bad hair, books, chexy takes on, crap, gorgeousness, kids, movies, oddities
I think that’s clear.
Pippa Middleton I don’t mind so much, but Bri said he doesn’t give a shit about her, so I stuck her in there.
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in chexy takes on, crap, morons
Dear Holy Father,
It’s not looking good for you. You’re 84, you’re THE POPE, and you haven’t yet learned what Jesus taught. I expect a little better from someone who had the sense to get the heck out of the Hitler Youth.
Let me make it simple for you, Your Holiness. Gay marriage is not a threat to the family. Snooki is a threat to the family. Kim Kardashian is a threat to the family. Trans fats, high fructose corn syrup and Newt Gingrich are a threat to the family. Faygelehs? Only a threat to bad decor… and not all of them.
Since I have your attention, you might want to talk to your tailor about updating your look. Those glittery robes and pointy hats are so 2nd century.
There are only half a million gay marriages in the US. There are 76 million American Express cardholders. I’d be concerned about that.
When you look at all the things that ail mankind (and I don’t mean Catholicism), the persecution of the legal coupling of people who would like to have privileges that they pay for others to have, and calling it a threat to the familly, seems a bit like saying that dinner mints are a threat to civilization. Okay, maybe the ones with jelly in them.
I’ll try to say it like Jesus did, or better yet, I’ll let Him say it:
I give you a new commandment:
Love one another;
just as I have loved you,
you also must love one another. (John 13:34)
Thanks for staying awake to read this.
Love,
Your Chexy
P.S. LOVE love luuuuuv the red shoes!
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in bad form, chexy takes on, gays, oh yes he did, pope, religion, righteousness
Tiger Woods’ ex tore down this $12-million mansion in order to rebuild on the property. I get it.
There are excesses we can all do without, but when one has the resources to effectively follow every whim and desire, it’s understandable why she’d want to tear down a reasonable house to ensure that every fixture and outlet is exactly where she wants them. No one wants a room with inconvenient outlets, let alone 9,000 square feet of rooms with them. Extension cords and power strips are so inelegant.
We all spend money on things we can do without. I’m a collector and single father of an imaginary daughter, so I spend money on chatchka nonsense made possible by disposable income. I like yellow pottery, so I buy it. Some people like bigger houses, so they tear down perfectly good ones. It’s all relative.
These Darfur refugees are not going for pedicures, pre-booking seats at the ArcLight or buying Caramel Brulée Frappucinos at Starbucks. Neither am I… I do have my own personal set of values.
How can I cluck my tongue at Elin Nordegren for laying waste to a $12-million house, while I throw out some minimally expired yogurt? If I had hit the cheating spouse super lotto, would I not be shopping for a larger home for my pottery collection?
Yes, I would. But I think I’d find an existing house that I liked, and just live in it. Unless, of course, the outlets were badly placed.
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in architecture, athletes, bad form, can you believe it?, chexy takes on, girls will be girls, money, my imaginary daughter amy, pearl clutch
“Robert Wagner will have dueling appearances on CBS this week: As a handcuffed character on “NCIS” Tuesday and subject of Saturday night’s “48 Hours” segment on Natalie Wood’s death almost 30 years ago,” reported Reuters on Saturday.
L.A. Sheriff Lee Baca, friend of such celebrities as Mel Gibson (the Sheriff’s Dept. initially said Gibson was arrested in Malibu “without incident”), has accepted numerous donations from CBS Chairman Les Moonves, seen above with second wife Julie Chen, host of “The Talk” on CBS.
Moonves has been a steady contributor to Baca’s campaigns, all within the legal limit.
Baca (seen above with Scientologist actress Sophia Milos on a Scientology float in 2004) was reelected in 2010, despite controversy over gifts and a “deputization” program that allowed celebrities to carry arms. The program was canceled after several incidents. He also released Paris Hilton early.
With there being no clear reason to reopen the case, and “no suspects,” one wonders if the whole thing was a publicity stunt to benefit CBS.
Here’s how CBS shared the story.
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in bad form, chexy takes on, daydream believer, mayhem, power, press
After Michael Lohan’s second arrest in as many days, I thought I’d put together a Stupidgraph™ to help understand why our culture is such a mess.
Winning imbecile Charlie Sheen, Khloe Kardashian mugshot, Danielle Staub and her eyebrows, momager Dina Lohan, polidiot Michele Bachmann, surgified dumbster Heidi Montag, slap-happy numbskull Chris Brown, box-of-rocks dumb Lindsay Lohan, starfaced tattoo girl, reality trash Snooki, country bankrupter George W. Bush, millionaire dumbfuck Kim Kardashian, Jersey emptyhead ‘The Situation’, Tea Party leader Sarah Palin, table-turner Teresa Giudice, and balcony jumper Michael Lohan.
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in bastards, chexy takes on, crap, morons, reality tv
When an annoying catchphrase gets its own kitteh meme, it’s time for me to rip on it.
And so I find myself today in the unenviable conundrum of having to disabuse people of the notion of using the horrid, pseudo-philosophical “It is what it is,” a bit of non-conversational drivel that has become the “go to” answer of competitors, executives, lowly office workers and wannabe urban Lamas who can’t think of anything better to say, but hope to sound like they’ve undergone some type of enlightened group training… perhaps for clowns.
It seems that folks are saying “It is what it is” as a kind of lackadaisical shrug; an acknowledgment that they can’t or won’t do anything because there’s nothing to be done. One just has to take it, or follow orders, or give up. It’s the reverse of the 1970s mantra “Question Authority,” from an era when asking questions and striving for change was considered part of one’s responsibility to society and country. John Kennedy’s call to “Ask not…” has become simply, “Don’t ask.”
One isn’t being Zen-like by saying “It is what it is,” one is being lemming-like, marching into the murky acceptance of things the way they are, abandoning any hope of real change, improvement or, heaven forbid, problem solving. This mindset is perhaps being fueled by the economy, and nobody wanting to speak up for fear they’ll be canned. It’s downright un-American. Would Jimmy Stewart have said “It Is What It Is” to the people of Bedford Falls? No, he told old Potter to stick it.
This isn’t to say that there aren’t things that one must accept in life, and there is a time to know what’s important to fight for and what isn’t. But when everything becomes a shrug and a wink, then the next thing you know, they’re at your door asking if you’d like to take a train ride someplace nice… like Buchenwald.
Yeah, I always come back to the Holocaust. I am what I am.
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in bad form, chexy takes on, language, my nerves, torture
The Scientologists have purchased the former PBS affiliate KCET in Los Angeles, reportedly for $14 million, and it looks like they need a studio to produce television programming to spread the word about their loony fanaticism.
Here’s a few of the titles we might expect:
Battlefield Earth: The Series
Suri’s Me Street
E-Metering with the Stars
I Love Xenu
The Real Housewives of Clearwater
The A-List with John Travolta and Tom Cruise
Without a Trace… of Personality
Live with Xenu and Kelly Preston
As the Volcano Turns
All My Children Are Brainwashed
A Billion Lives to Live
L. Ron Hubbard’s Celebrity Apprentice
Truth or Consequences
I’ve Got a Secret
Law & Order: Suppressive Persons Unit
America’s Funniest Homo Videos That We Keep in Our Vaults
Good Morning, Hemet!
Glib, She Wrote
Talk Barley Soup
Two and a Half Thetans
Auditor Science Fiction Theatre 3000
American Idol: OT VII
Married… with Children, But Only for Show
by Chexy and Johnny Lopez
Tom Cruise pic from Anorak.co.UK
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in chexy takes on, haters, horror, morons, power, reality tv, religion, terror, unfortunate
I’ve tried to watch various strains of the “Real Housewives” franchise and have been unable to tolerate the idiocy for more than a few minutes at a time. No sooner do I start watching then I begin to ask myself, with a remarkably harsh degree of incredulity about my tolerance for disgust, “Why are you watching this?”
I am then compelled to change the channel to something that contains at least some element of a life-enhancing experience, which will not include any franchise of “CSI” or “Law & Order.” I wish I were capable of upholding a level of head-shaking wonder that permitted me to warily observe the vapidity of the Housewives who conquer airwaves and populate chat shows with their fresh advice books. Who wants their advice?
Might I be inspired to better eating by the likes of Bethenny Frankel? Is it possible to improve my love life by genuflecting at the literary altar of one Nene Leakes? What on earth does Camille Grammer have to say that could be of any value to me? If Kelsey Grammer is willing to spend $50 million not to have to listen to her, why wouldn’t I do it for free?!
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in chexy takes on, oh the horror, reality tv
"If the phone doesn't ring, it's me.”
--Jimmy Buffett
