People mag has named Beyonce the “Most Beautiful Woman.”
Please. Everyone knows it’s really Sharon Needles.
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in fabulosity, gorgeousness, hotties, survey saidFrom the category archives:
survey said
If you know any fuckheads, bastards or bitches (who shall remain nameless), you might want to advise them to lighten up a little… or not — because they’re likely to die sooner than their pleasantly optimistic frenemies.
According to a new Harvard School of Public Health study, cheerfulness may protect against heart problems! I’m sure that looking at a picture of Camilla or the Duchess of Alba also works.
Optimism, satisfaction with life, and general happiness seem to be linked with a reduction in heart and circulatory diseases — regardless of age, socio-economic status, smoking or even body weight. So at least be happy knowing that cunty fuckers will die early!
Please remind all those miserable sonsabitches you know that the disease risk may be as much as 50% lower for cheery sorts.
Sorry, you can’t just be cheerful. You’ve still got to eat right.
via BBC
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in science, stuff I like, survey said
Here are three of the former candidates for the Republican nomination. I’ll look forward to their appearances at the 2012 Republican National Convention in Tampa Bay this August.
One to go!
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in bad hair, bastards, food, politics, survey said
Heroes of the Right: Moronic Teabagger Sarah Palin, Very Dead Republican Barry Goldwater, Gun Enthusiast Charlton Heston, Gunshot Victim Ronald Reagan, Imbecile Real Estate Scion Donald Trump, Freshly Dead Hater Andrew Breitbart, Undead VP Dick Cheney, Radio Blowhard Rush Limbaugh, Political Third Wife Callista Gingrich.
Heroes of the Left: Democrat Playboys the Kennedy Brothers, Social Change Singer Bob Dylan, Cable Cutup Jon Stewart, Seat Defender Rosa Parks, American Wit Stephen Colbert, Hero President Barack Obama, Gay Rights Defender Ellen DeGeneres, Depression Stopper FDR, Political Great Rep. Barney Frank.
Just a little sampling for ya.
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in can you believe it?, chexy takes on, kennedys, morons, politics, righteousness, stuff I like, survey said
Callista Gingrich’s hair won the Georgia primary today, bringing the State of Georgia yet another dubious tonsorial and political distinction, with a whopping 48% of the vote.
Various exit polls were abandoned when pollsters were overcome by hairspray fumes. Two were hospitalized in Gwinnett County alone.
“I know I haven’t got a chance,” said her hair, “because y’all are so jelly of me.”
The hair then refused to speak until it concedes the race to Ann Romney’s vapidity.
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in last hurrahs, politics, survey said
It’s time to play everyone’s favorite home game, “Clock the Drag Queen”!
These nine beauties attended the Jersey Couture Pop-Up Beauty Bar event last night in NYC. Can you guess which one is not a biological woman?! (click pic to enlarge, scroll down for answer)
Answers: (left to right) Sammi Giancola, Tracy DiMarco, Deena Cortese, Carmen Carrera, Johanna Sambucini, Tinsley Mortimer, Sandra Denton and Cheryl Salt James, Sharie Manon.
Carmen is the man. I think.
via Johnny Lopez
Getty
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in bad hair, chexy's fashion report, girls will be girls, gorgeousness, hot messes, stuff I like, survey said, ya gotta love it
I think I’ll do some housework today.
More modern men are unable to complete traditional male tasks, new research shows Generation Y women can’t do the chores their mothers and grandmothers did daily, reports The Courier-Mail.
Only 51 per cent of women under 30 can cook a roast, compared with 82 per cent of baby boomers.
Luckily, they have other skills.
via News.com.au
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in little known facts, oddities, survey said
Mattel’s Magic 8 Ball, that fascinating decision maker for the “I don’t know” crowd (you know who you are). What’s inside, you ask? Signs point to me telling you.
Inside that little black sphere is an icosahedron… here’s a nice rotating one. And no, Tippi Icosahedron was not in “The Birds.” (Sorry, Morgan.)
There are, you math whizzes know, 20 possible answers inside the ball…
● It is certain
● It is decidedly so
● Without a doubt
● Yes – definitely
● You may rely on it
● As I see it, yes
● Most likely
● Outlook good
● Signs point to yes
● Yes
● Reply hazy, try again
● Ask again later
● Better not tell you now
● Cannot predict now
● Concentrate and ask again
● Don’t count on it
● My reply is no
● My sources say no
● Outlook not so good
● Very doubtful
I would like to add my own 20 answers to a Magic 8-Ball, inspired by my sage grandmother, who had all the answers:
- Why you asking me?
- Do I bother you with such nonsense?
- You think I know?
- Yeah, sure, if you think so.
- You really want my answer?
- Ich vais nisht!
- You need to ask?
- Go know!
- I have no idea.
- You already know the answer.
- Sit down until you know.
- You really want an answer from a plastic ball?
- I never thought about it.
- Ask him!
- Ask her!
- Why ask?!
- If you have to ask…
- Seriously, you’re a putz.
- I’m not in the mood for your questions.
- Why?
The 8-Ball, as we know it now, was created in 1950. But the original gizmo was invented by one Albert C. Carter, who based the original design on one his clairvoyant mother used. Then a guy named Max Levinson and his brother-in-law Abe Bookman partnered with Alabe Crafts in 1946, and they sold it as the Syco-Seer. Not a good name, although they had it inside a glitzy crystal ball. Brunswick Billiards turned it into the 8 ball in 1950. Mattel somehow got a hold of it.
Illustration: Fashionably Geek
for Beck, who would have been 104 this week.
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in crap, daydream believer, everyday objects, i have no idea, little known facts, survey said, wonders
Jennifer’s estranged husband, Marc Anthony, above… and below, the star of her last music video, William Levy… with whom she is rumored to be having an affair. Rumored. They deny.
Tough choice.
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in hotties, oooph, survey said
I made this Nicolas Cage pic a little smaller so as not to sicken anyone who may have just eaten breakfast… or lunch or dinner. Actually, he looks kind of nauseated, doesn’t he? Oh, he always looks like that. Right.
How many Cage movies have I not seen? Let’s see… I believe I got through the first reel of “Raising Arizona,” and a half hour of “Con Air” while flipping channels in a hotel room. That’s it.
So I won’t be seeing “The Sorcerer’s Apprentice” when it opens July 14th at a theatre near you… or ever. Nice weave, though.
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in bad hair, crap, movies, no, survey said
